Cusspoptom is a god.

It takes the form of a minute, selfish bear.

Cusspoptom created the universe three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cusspoptom, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Cusspoptom, it will turn you into a slug.

Cusspoptom's most sacred site is Katballe in Denmark.

Cusspoptom's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Cusspoptom.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Cusspoptom.

3. Never talk about grasshopers.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Do not hurt cats.