Nelvedquam is a god.

She takes the form of a three hundred metre long, awe-inspiring lizard.

Nelvedquam created tapeworms six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nelvedquam, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Nelvedquam, she will destroy your home planet.

Nelvedquam's most sacred site is Syndendro in Greece.

Nelvedquam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in blue rooms.

2. Never think about black holes.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Always treat monkeys with great respect.

5. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.