Nullcussrutt is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, happy elephant.

Nullcussrutt created Mount Everest four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nullcussrutt, it will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Nullcussrutt, it will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Nullcussrutt's most sacred site is Skive in Denmark.

Nullcussrutt's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat peas.

2. Draw representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

4. Feed all hungry squirrels.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.