Zenmobbon is a god.

She takes the form of a three hundred metre long, quiet dugong.

Zenmobbon created the planet Jupiter seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Zenmobbon, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Zenmobbon, she will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Zenmobbon's most sacred site is Aranganur in India.

Zenmobbon's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate hamsters.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. You must love Zenmobbon.

4. Do not speak about cherries.

5. Never eat bark.