Hiv is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, cheerful sheep.

Hiv created a photon two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Hiv, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Hiv, it will turn you into a dog.

Hiv's most sacred site is Edenryd in Sweden.

Hiv's Holy Commandments

1. Hiv loves moths, so they must be respected.

2. Do not hurt mites.

3. Do not trade with those who eat rice.

4. Do not fashion models of living things.

5. Do not chop down trees.