Flatwadzig is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, selfish beaver.

Flatwadzig created the Small Magellanic Cloud nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Flatwadzig, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Flatwadzig, it will have a low opinion of you.

Flatwadzig's most sacred site is Villaseta in Italy.

Flatwadzig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Never go into turquoise rooms.

3. Flatwadzig loves ants, so they must be honoured.

4. Erect a giant gray sculpture of Flatwadzig in the centre of the settlement.

5. Put Flatwadzig first in all things.