Hotnigfud is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, moody skunk.

Hotnigfud created dark energy four years ago.

If you believe in Hotnigfud, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Hotnigfud, he will turn you into a frog.

Hotnigfud's most sacred site is Grimme in Germany.

Hotnigfud's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Learn seven new languages a year.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

4. Always help squirrels.

5. Never eat peas.