Cissgarbab Godkarflap is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, temperamental lion.

Cissgarbab Godkarflap created the planet Earth nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cissgarbab Godkarflap, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Cissgarbab Godkarflap, it will send minions to preach to you.

Cissgarbab Godkarflap's most sacred site is Ylike in Finland.

Cissgarbab Godkarflap's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed beans to ants while wearing shoes.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Do not trade with those who eat wheat.

5. Never think ill of sick turtles.