Cepkikflig is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, competent bear.

Cepkikflig created dark energy nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Cepkikflig, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Cepkikflig, he will turn you into a frog.

Cepkikflig's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Cepkikflig's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your head blue.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Cepkikflig.

3. Never wear corsets.

4. Never think about electromagnetism near eagles while wearing pink scarves and balancing five iron spheres on your hands.

5. Never write about quantum field theory.