Guntomciss is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, kind human.

Guntomciss created a photon three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Guntomciss, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Guntomciss, he will turn you into a blue tit.

Guntomciss' most sacred site is Daraina in Madagascar.

Guntomciss' Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Gulls are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Do not kill voles.

5. Put Guntomciss first in all things.