Tighivsat is a god.
She takes the form of a slim, kind
cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.
Tighivsat created carbon eight thousand years ago.
If you believe in
Tighivsat, she will grant all your wishes.
If you do not believe in
Tighivsat, she will turn you into a rock.
Tighivsat's most sacred site is Sirama in Madagascar.
Tighivsat's Holy Commandments1. Always obey Tighivsat's priests.
2. Always stare at clouds.
3. Never sprint in the presence of dogs.
4. Never feed strawberries to manatees while wearing yellow shorts.
5. Tighivsat must be the most important thing in your life.