Queegteentarg is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely heavy, able tortoise.

Queegteentarg created bats three million years ago.

If you believe in Queegteentarg, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Queegteentarg, it will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Queegteentarg's most sacred site is Taktser in China.

Queegteentarg's Holy Commandments

1. Put Queegteentarg first in all things.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Never think about dark matter near ducks while wearing fawn shoes and balancing four silver spheres on your legs.

4. Paint representations of dwarf planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Do not chop down trees.