Damsakgud is a god.

He takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, omnipotent hippopotamus.

Damsakgud created a bottom quark three billion years ago.

If you believe in Damsakgud, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Damsakgud, he will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Damsakgud's most sacred site is Aranganur in India.

Damsakgud's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Damsakgud's name in vain.

2. Worship no other gods but Damsakgud.

3. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Damsakgud.

5. Fast once a month.