Fadvidtik is a god.

He takes the form of a small, awesome warg.

Fadvidtik created water five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fadvidtik, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Fadvidtik, he will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Fadvidtik's most sacred site is Oitti in Finland.

Fadvidtik's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about dark matter near nematodes while wearing mauve boots and balancing seven lead spheres on your face.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Do not sit in public.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Hide if five geese approach from the south.