Watbigmab is a god.

It takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, merciless bat.

Watbigmab created viruses two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Watbigmab, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Watbigmab, it will turn you into a plant.

Watbigmab's most sacred site is Nakke in Denmark.

Watbigmab's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about moons.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Never talk about quantum mechanics near frogs while wearing cyan corsets and balancing three gold spheres on your head.

4. Do not cook food in pots.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.