Yarpyakcan is a god.

It takes the form of a five hundred metre long, dishonourable chicken.

Yarpyakcan created dark energy seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yarpyakcan, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Yarpyakcan, it will manifest in front of you.

Yarpyakcan's most sacred site is Manja in Madagascar.

Yarpyakcan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill great tits.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Always help sick aardvarks.

4. Never feed strawberries to cats while wearing white ear rings.

5. Never look in ponds.