Bassfotflisart is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, almighty shrew.

Bassfotflisart created matter eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bassfotflisart, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Bassfotflisart, he will throw large rocks at you.

Bassfotflisart's most sacred site is Ringford in Scotland.

Bassfotflisart's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Do not shave your back.

3. Never paint your legs brown.

4. Never write about electromagnetism.

5. Hide if nine monkeys approach from the north.