Jontaphot is a god.

It takes the form of a four hundred metre long, benevolent dove.

Jontaphot created viruses seven million years ago.

If you believe in Jontaphot, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Jontaphot, it will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Jontaphot's most sacred site is Wukan in China.

Jontaphot's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from orange snails, for they are unholy.

2. Never chant in the presence of manatees.

3. Always help squirrels in need.

4. Never hurt moths.

5. Never talk about mice.