Sawlipsug is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, merciless parrot.

Sawlipsug created dark matter four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Sawlipsug, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Sawlipsug, it will say rude things about you at parties.

Sawlipsug's most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Sawlipsug's Holy Commandments

1. Always help mice in need.

2. You must never eat spinach.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Sawlipsug.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. Walk at least seven thousand metres per day.