Xemjabfarn Futquatdob is a god.

He takes the form of a five hundred metre long, awesome crocodile.

Xemjabfarn Futquatdob created a bottom quark eight million years ago.

If you believe in Xemjabfarn Futquatdob, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Xemjabfarn Futquatdob, he will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Xemjabfarn Futquatdob's most sacred site is Bodieve in England.

Xemjabfarn Futquatdob's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Do not chop down trees.

3. Never go into gray rooms.

4. Do not cook food in pots.

5. Do not listen to music.