Cenflanrak is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely fat, awesome shark.

Cenflanrak created the cosmos four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cenflanrak, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Cenflanrak, she will make you grow a tail.

Cenflanrak's most sacred site is Khwee in Botswana.

Cenflanrak's Holy Commandments

1. Always obey Cenflanrak's priests.

2. Always stare at clouds.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Cenflanrak.

5. Never talk about monkeys.