Ripnegxen is a god.

He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, witty seal.

Ripnegxen created the solar system six million years ago.

If you believe in Ripnegxen, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Ripnegxen, he will turn you into a hamster.

Ripnegxen's most sacred site is Fangchuan in China.

Ripnegxen's Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Never look at comets.

3. Put Ripnegxen first in all things.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Do not stand on grass.