Nelarnton is a god.

She takes the form of a huge, witty centipede.

Nelarnton created the cosmos nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Nelarnton, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Nelarnton, she will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Nelarnton's most sacred site is Hetta in Finland.

Nelarnton's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in gray rooms.

2. Eagles are not to be trusted.

3. Nelarnton loves sheep, so they must be respected.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Erect a giant mauve sculpture of Nelarnton in the centre of the settlement.