Ditliplim is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, fussy fly.

Ditliplim created a strange quark three million years ago.

If you believe in Ditliplim, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Ditliplim, he will send you a sign.

Ditliplim's most sacred site is Ringsted in Denmark.

Ditliplim's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from blue geese for they are unholy.

2. Never paint your chest pink.

3. Never feed lots of bananas to aardvarks while wearing turquoise dresses.

4. Do not drink water in red rooms.

5. You must pray to Ditliplim three times a day.