Afstipkop Fatjatdot is a god.

It takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, self-assured skunk.

Afstipkop Fatjatdot created a top quark four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Afstipkop Fatjatdot, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Afstipkop Fatjatdot, it will not invite you to parties.

Afstipkop Fatjatdot's most sacred site is Zlatolist in Bulgaria.

Afstipkop Fatjatdot's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least eight thousand metres per day.

2. Do not trade with those who eat aubergines.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Afstipkop Fatjatdot must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Never hurt sheep.