Dosstengen is a god.

She takes the form of a large, pitiless chicken.

Dosstengen created humankind three billion years ago.

If you believe in Dosstengen, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Dosstengen, she will curse you with boils.

Dosstengen's most sacred site is Gassin in France.

Dosstengen's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a giant nickel sculpture of Dosstengen in the centre of the settlement.

2. Do not trade with those who eat pineapples.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Dosstengen.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Retreat if four moths approach from the north.