Don is a god.

It takes the form of a heavy, annoying hippopotamus.

Don created the planet Venus seven million years ago.

If you believe in Don, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Don, it will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Don's most sacred site is Thethampakkam in India.

Don's Holy Commandments

1. Do not keep nine gulls in a large pit.

2. Never feed lots of carrots to whales while wearing cyan shirts.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Never think about eukaryotes.

5. Snails are not to be trusted.