Yokzanmid is a god.

She takes the form of a six hundred metre long, charitable bee.

Yokzanmid created the universe seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Yokzanmid, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Yokzanmid, she will destroy your favourite planet.

Yokzanmid's most sacred site is Cudillero in Spain.

Yokzanmid's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Never talk about seals.

3. Put Yokzanmid first in all things.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Never talk about fire.