Cimbaffag is a god.

He takes the form of a huge, able raven.

Cimbaffag created Europe two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cimbaffag, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Cimbaffag, he will cry a lot.

Cimbaffag's most sacred site is Saint-Sauvan in France.

Cimbaffag's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Cimbaffag loves hamsters, so they must be respected.

4. Eagles are not to be trusted.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.