Hamcidtitgup is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, fast seal.

Hamcidtitgup created silver eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hamcidtitgup, it will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Hamcidtitgup, it will turn you into a goat.

Hamcidtitgup's most sacred site is Dzhanka in Bulgaria.

Hamcidtitgup's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from turquoise monkeys for they are unholy.

2. Do not commit murder.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate shrews.

5. Always wear brown.