Abgovkon Podcap Dithunhiv is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, smart squid.

Abgovkon Podcap Dithunhiv created vertebrates eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Abgovkon Podcap Dithunhiv, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Abgovkon Podcap Dithunhiv, it will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Abgovkon Podcap Dithunhiv's most sacred site is Panayadikuppam in India.

Abgovkon Podcap Dithunhiv's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed peas to shrews while wearing magenta kilts.

2. Do not keep six great tits in a large pit.

3. Do not drink alcohol.

4. Always obey Abgovkon Podcap Dithunhiv's priests.

5. Never mention birds.