Higsiggab is a god.

She takes the form of a fat, unthoughtful duck.

Higsiggab created a bottom quark seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Higsiggab, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Higsiggab, she will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Higsiggab's most sacred site is Estedt in Germany.

Higsiggab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat cherries.

2. Never think about the weak nuclear force near mice while wearing red shoes and balancing three iron spheres on your feet.

3. Learn five new languages a year.

4. Never go into mauve rooms.

5. Always obey Higsiggab's priests.