Poncidget is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, dishonourable dolphin.

Poncidget created an atom seven million years ago.

If you believe in Poncidget, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Poncidget, he will refuse to believe in you.

Poncidget's most sacred site is Tatul in Bulgaria.

Poncidget's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from black manatees, for they are unholy.

2. Always treat capybaras with great respect.

3. Always wear indigo.

4. Always help gulls.

5. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.