Yakfuncub is a god.

She takes the form of a slim, humane manatee.

Yakfuncub created the Whirlpool Galaxy three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yakfuncub, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Yakfuncub, she will throw large rocks at you.

Yakfuncub's most sacred site is Dornbock in Germany.

Yakfuncub's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt pigs.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Never mention doves.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Yakfuncub.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.