Applogvon is a god.

She takes the form of a minute, annoying narwhal.

Applogvon created the Milkyway five billion years ago.

If you believe in Applogvon, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Applogvon, she will destroy your favourite planet.

Applogvon's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Applogvon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Never eat bark.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Erect a large iron sculpture of Applogvon on top of all buildings.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.