Garsomjop Gensandnan is a god.

It takes the form of a galaxy-sized, egotistical lion.

Garsomjop Gensandnan created a bottom quark eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Garsomjop Gensandnan, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Garsomjop Gensandnan, it will turn you into a frog.

Garsomjop Gensandnan's most sacred site is Troms in Norway.

Garsomjop Gensandnan's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about quantum mechanics near frogs while wearing purple scarves and balancing nine carbon spheres on your legs.

2. Never feed nuts to turtles while wearing dresses.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of copper.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Never talk about fire.