Jadmetyarl is a god.

He takes the form of a slender, fast hydra.

Jadmetyarl created energy seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jadmetyarl, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Jadmetyarl, he will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Jadmetyarl's most sacred site is Burras in England.

Jadmetyarl's Holy Commandments

1. Never look at comets.

2. Always wear turquoise.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Hide from green gulls for they are unholy.

5. Always look after injured bats.