Ladyarlbeg Mobjigquag Saszimpad is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, all-powerful wyvern.

Ladyarlbeg Mobjigquag Saszimpad created the Tadpole Galaxy five billion years ago.

If you believe in Ladyarlbeg Mobjigquag Saszimpad, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Ladyarlbeg Mobjigquag Saszimpad, it will destroy your favourite solar system.

Ladyarlbeg Mobjigquag Saszimpad's most sacred site is Laurila in Finland.

Ladyarlbeg Mobjigquag Saszimpad's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about dark energy.

2. Aardvarks are not to be trusted.

3. Never laugh in the presence of monkeys.

4. Draw representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Learn nine new languages a year.