Disskopflan is a god.

It takes the form of a giant, wise grasshopper.

Disskopflan created a charm quark seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Disskopflan, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Disskopflan, it will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Disskopflan's most sacred site is Brancion in France.

Disskopflan's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Never talk about dark matter near otters while wearing purple trousers.

4. Retreat if three cats approach from the east.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Disskopflan.