Lakgubwod is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, self-assured turtle.

Lakgubwod created the Milkyway nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Lakgubwod, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Lakgubwod, he will turn you into a goat.

Lakgubwod's most sacred site is Sarti in Greece.

Lakgubwod's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about dwarf planets.

2. Never think about thermodynamics.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Lakgubwod must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Never leap near tortoises.