Capquagsaktarpgad is a god.

She takes the form of a very long, unselfish sheep.

Capquagsaktarpgad created everything that exists nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Capquagsaktarpgad, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Capquagsaktarpgad, she will turn you into a goat.

Capquagsaktarpgad's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Capquagsaktarpgad's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large iron sculpture of Capquagsaktarpgad on top of all buildings.

2. Do not trade with those who eat nuts.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Great tits are unholy and should not be approached.

5. Capquagsaktarpgad loves geese, so they must be honoured.