Spagtinxem Bambonkmet is a god.

It takes the form of a five hundred metre long, sage chicken.

Spagtinxem Bambonkmet created the planet Earth four billion years ago.

If you believe in Spagtinxem Bambonkmet, it will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Spagtinxem Bambonkmet, it will turn you into a sparrow.

Spagtinxem Bambonkmet's most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Spagtinxem Bambonkmet's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about carrots.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Do not wear violet clothing.

5. Always pray immersed in water.