Fetnellap is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, ill-tempered scorpion.

Fetnellap created Mount Everest six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fetnellap, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Fetnellap, it will have a very low opinion of you.

Fetnellap's most sacred site is Pontelandolfo in Italy.

Fetnellap's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about spacetime near manatees while wearing indigo stockings and balancing three lead spheres on your back.

2. Never write about cell theory.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.