Lincibkip is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, generous beaver.

Lincibkip created energy two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Lincibkip, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Lincibkip, he will turn you into a mouse.

Lincibkip's most sacred site is Hetta in Finland.

Lincibkip's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate foxes.

2. Never wear indigo jumpers.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Always look after injured tortoises.

5. Paint representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place in mauve.