Baghotkon is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely small, capable shrew.

Baghotkon created tapeworms seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Baghotkon, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Baghotkon, he will not invite you to parties.

Baghotkon's most sacred site is Aguaruto in Mexico.

Baghotkon's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed spinach to squirrels while wearing fawn shirts.

2. Do not shave your arms.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Never wear corsets.

5. Always look after injured dolphins.