Gebstigart is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely thin, ruthless alligator.

Gebstigart created water five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gebstigart, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Gebstigart, he will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Gebstigart's most sacred site is Hej in Sweden.

Gebstigart's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into pink rooms.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate shrews.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Do not listen to music.