Linjamvan is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, unsympathetic weasel.

Linjamvan created a photon two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Linjamvan, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Linjamvan, he will send you a strongly worded letter.

Linjamvan's most sacred site is Panayadikuppam in India.

Linjamvan's Holy Commandments

1. Draw representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Linjamvan loves rats, so they must be honoured.

3. Never think about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

4. Never sing near shrews.

5. Pray towards the south.