Larpratvag is a god.

She takes the form of a corpulent, generous owl.

Larpratvag created carbon five million years ago.

If you believe in Larpratvag, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Larpratvag, she will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Larpratvag's most sacred site is Sarti in Greece.

Larpratvag's Holy Commandments

1. Gulls are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

3. Put Larpratvag first in all things.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Never eat green fruit.