Bigfagdap is a god.

He takes the form of a very long, selfish cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Bigfagdap created water six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bigfagdap, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Bigfagdap, he will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Bigfagdap's most sacred site is Krina in Germany.

Bigfagdap's Holy Commandments

1. Never skip near aardvarks.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of tin.

4. Always help mice in need.

5. Never think about thermodynamics near gulls while wearing brown tights and balancing three carbon spheres on your face.