Tettinegbudfumstighim is a god.

He takes the form of a very long, effective owl.

Tettinegbudfumstighim created carbon seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tettinegbudfumstighim, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Tettinegbudfumstighim, he will say rude things about you at parties.

Tettinegbudfumstighim's most sacred site is Bertkow in Germany.

Tettinegbudfumstighim's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat lentils.

2. Always make sure there are no ducks in a building before entering it.

3. Put Tettinegbudfumstighim first in all things.

4. Erect five platinum sculptures of Tettinegbudfumstighim on top of important buildings.

5. Do not trade with those who eat tomatoes.